Mean Girls at Work

July 23, 2012
For their latest, business coaches Crowley and Elster (coauthors of Working with You Is Killing Me) offer a wan, patronizing look at office politics between professional women. The authors break down the various kinds of “difficult” women one may encounter at work—those for whom being mean, overtly or covertly, is a method of career survival; cliquey women; drama queens; and those who are unaware they’re being mean. They break down the subtle kinds of insults and injuries that women inflict upon each other in the workplace, including gossip, exclusion, small slights, and outright sabotage. Crowley and Elster suggest a somewhat passive course of action—the “Don’t Go There” route, which describes a strategy of professional defusing—illustrated through a series of Cosmoesque exaggerated fables. While the suggested solutions are reasonable, and some of the scenarios are doubtless a concern for some women in the workplace, the overall tone is superficial. The opening (“Just as there’s a little bad in every boy, there’s a little mean in every girl”) should be a signal to the reader that unless she is a 14-year-old girl, she should look elsewhere for help navigating office politics. Agent: Elaine Markson, Markson Thoma Literary Agency.

November 1, 2012

Psychotherapist Crowley and management consultant Elster (coauthors, Working with You Is Killing Me) return to the subject of toxic workplaces, but their focus is on "mean girls," or especially noxious women colleagues, and the numerous ways they can affect the satisfaction and career goals of their fellow female coworkers. It's a narrow subject, and the book reads more like an online advice article than a cohesive narrative. Each chapter describes a different type of mean girl, from "meanest of the mean" to "group mean," and every mean in between, and then offers advice in the form of "Don't Go There" (actions you shouldn't take) and "Go Here" (actions you should), as well as sidebar "Coffee Breaks" that give general advice for such challenging workplaces. VERDICT If working with a "mean girl" is truly a reader's biggest problem at work, dipping into this book for specific advice might help. Those looking for broader suggestions on workplace relations might prefer the authors' earlier book or more engaging titles like Robert Sutton's The No Asshole Rule.--Sarah Statz Cords, The Reader's Advisor Online, Middleton, WI

Copyright 2012 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

Starred review from October 1, 2012
Years ago, it was called the Queen Bee Syndrome, denoting the propensity of female bosses to overdo their authority in the workplace. Now, psychotherapist-consultant team and multibook authors (including Working with You Is Killing Me, 2006) Crowley and Elster more precisely define the mean bee, segmenting bad female behaviors into seven categories: meanest of the mean, very mean, passively mean, doesn't mean to be mean, doesn't know she's mean, brings out your mean, and group mean. Not enough differentiation among these personalities, you fear? Relax; perhaps the most critical part of the book is when the authors first describe the specific variations of meanness, then detail not only particular actions but also your feelings and what to do (as well as what not to do). One case among dozens is this: being excluded from a meeting. The rule is, don't assume it's purposeful. Simply say you believe it was an oversight and continue to repeat, I'd like to be included in any future meetings of this kind. That type of listing can get tedious; Crowley and Elster change it up by including real-life but disguised stories in the chapter In Her Own Words and general psychological reinforcements in Coffee Breaks, with topics ranging from taking it less personally to pausing to breathe.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2012, American Library Association.)